Late night ramblings on an empty stomach

It’s really late right now but this is like, my favorite thing ever

I’m trying to find another thing that made me laugh but I can’t figure out which post it was in! Sadness.

Listening to: Birdy – Terrible Love

I drove back to SoCal on Friday morning (as in, 5am morning) because the partner of my last client said the team should just take Friday off. It was either, take the train up to Seattle and fly back, or drive home. The flights back from Seattle were really expensive and also at not great times, so I decided to drive home. FUN TIMES.

I always drove back and forth during the nighttime so I always wear a long-sleeve and hoodie because by the time I am halfway to my destination, it’s always freezing. So I did the same … it was 5am, still dark, and I thought, duh. Wear a sweater.

Well, halfway into my drive, it was 8am and 70 degrees and I was like, ergh it’s kind of warm. Then it was 9am and I was getting closer and closer to SoCal and suddenly it was like 80 degrees, and I think I ended up sweating in my car for the next two hours. I refused to turn on the AC because I didn’t want to stop for gas (WOOT and MADE it home on one tank! I have noticed that I am never able to make it up north on one tank though). Lesson learned. Also, while I usually disobey my mom and drive super late at night, I guess it actually is nicer to just drive super early in the morning.

Friday, after getting in, ate lunch at home then went house exploring with my mom. She is planning on getting the house repainted so her new favorite activity is to walk around neighborhoods and look at people’s paint colors

Mom: Oh. A few days ago, I called this one guy to ask if he could come by and do an estimate on the house. He called back a day later and when I picked up, I couldn’t tell who it was. You know how all Cantonese people sound the same. So I went “hello? hello?” and hung up. Later I called him and said “you never called back!” and he said “I did! But you hung up on me!” So I said “oh, that must have been my daughter. She doesn’t speak very good Chinese so she must have hung up on you.” So when he comes to the house tomorrow, he’s going to think you hung up on him. Sorry.

Then Friday night, I drove to UCLA and met up with Henry and he took me to Fundamental LA (YUM) then a cute little cafe for pretzels. I also got a green tea latte and it was AMAZING. The cashier at Fundamental LA looked like Audrina Partridge with a small mix of Anna Kendrick. Well, a prettier, pre-plastic surgery Audrina Partridge, and without the Ceiling Eyes. Sometimes when I am in front of an attractive looking person I think this is just a lot to take in, visually and end up looking off into different directions. Henry pointed out that there are a lot of new restaurants in LA that are started by young Korean-American men, which seems true (the other explanation being that we only ever go to such restaurants). Koreans are amazing at starting businesses. And they’re so good at Asian fusion things. I always assume that these random foods like bulgogi tacos and that red bean & cheese pretzel I had were just the product of some guy being super high and drunk and thinking (correctly) that random combinations of foods would taste good.

Saturday, I went to the arboretum with my mom. So I have always told people that if I were to get married, I’d want it to be in the botanical garden. But while walking around the arboretum, everything just seemed so brown. I guess I need a new wedding setting. I guess I want it to look like the Twilight wedding (HAHA of all things)

Is this a real place or is it all digitalized?

It looks like they got married in the woods. I don’t want to be married in such a damp looking place. But I guess if  I want to be married in greenery, it’ll have to come hand in hand with dampness.

I never watched Breaking Dawn. Who are all those people at her wedding? I was under the impression that Bella was the kind of girl who didn’t hang out with anyone except her boyfriend, and wouldn’t have very many people to invite to the wedding.

OH. I think this was what made me laugh

Mom: Your dad has no taste and no ability to color coordinate. Sometimes I’ll look at what he’s wearing and tell him ‘can you go change?’ But I have to access his mood before I do it. Usually he says ok. But the only time I really cared about what he looked like was when we went to Taiwan together. My greatest fear was that I would run into my ex-boyfriend in Taiwan and he would look at your dad and think ‘so this is who you married?’ So I made sure his outfits were acceptable when we went out in Taiwan. Your dad would come to me and ask ‘is this ok?’ and I would say “yes that is ok.’ I never told him why I cared.

Then I went out to UCLA AGAIN HAHA but this time to hang out with Angelica! YUM. She took me to Sweet Rose Creamery. She said it’s better than Ici’s. Well. The portions were much larger, as were the tasting spoon portions. The line also went by much faster. I didn’t get a cone but they make waffle cones and I like waffle cones the best. I had looked at the cones and asked Angelica “do they make those themselves?” and she said yes. Which was when I realized that I snobbishly believe all worthwhile ice cream places should be making their own cones. HAHA Spoiled by the Bay Area. They had orange coriander which was yummy, and a mint chip that was not a typical mint flavor but a lot like eating a mojito. I ended up getting earl grey. But they had a LOT of flavors I wanted to try: black sesame, verve coffee, lavender honey… yummmmmm. It’s in Brentwood – when Angelica told me where we were I said “BRENTWOOD?! Jennifer Garner lives here!” and she said “so does Reese Witherspoon! This is where she got hit by that car!” and I was like OOO.

Then we went back to her apt and the main thing I remember about tonight was us playing with Google Map’s new feature where, if you type in a region, it’ll show up on a map with a border outline. The only other place I’ve seen this happen was on Yelp. I have no idea how Yelp did it first. It’s very interesting to see the border map for LA. And for West LA. Everyone always says so and so is at West LA. Well, according to google maps, West LA looks tiny. I have a feeling when people say West LA, they actually mean Santa Monica.

I think the only freeway I ever drive when I’m in SoCal is the 10. It is quite a fun freeway to drive. The times I’ve gone it, traffic is decent and I can zip along. It may be the only SoCal freeway I’m familiar with for more than a 10 mile stretch.

It’s 3am! I have to wake up early and finish reading this book that I’ve been reading for the past two years. HAHA

I’m going to drive back up to NorCal tomorrow in 12 hours or so! Sad – I will miss the Oscars. Except I don’t think I’ve watched any of the movies nominated, so I guess I don’t really mind.

OMG HAHA So I “liked” Seattle on my Facebook and sometimes I will get Seattle posts on my feed. I have no idea who is the person posting stuff to the page, but it is surprisingly (or maybe not so surprisingly) one of my favorite things to follow on FB. Sometimes they post pics of random places in Seattle. They posted this

And my immediate thought was “this was taken in Discovery Park. The photographer was looking west out into the ocean.”

And per the comments, I WAS TOTALLY SPOT ON.


A two day weekend!!!

Still listening to: Lana del Rey – Summertime Sadness (Reich & Bleich remix)

The telltale sign that I went hiking

Recently my idle thoughts have centered around the question of where will I go on vacation this year? Work has turned a complete 180 and is extremely chill now, so I plan to go to the library tomorrow after work and pick up some tour books to peruse.

Last weekend I …

Ate dinner with Laura at Dishdash in downtown Sunnyvale on Friday night. And came to the realization (for the 600th time) that if I don’t watch out, the next six years of my life will probably flash before my eyes and I’ll one day find myself still single, still auditing, and still living in the worst part of the Bay Area (in my opinion)

I live around the southernmost Car Dealership and Office.

Saturday I intended to kickstart my morning around 7am but failed. I’m glad I stubbornly refused to give up my intention to go to the gym though. I always plan to wake up, deny myself the pleasure of watching tv in bed, and just immediately jump up and go to the gym. It worked maybe three times a year ago. When the morning arrives, it’s so hard to get up! I just lie there and roll around from side to side. I’ve developed a bad habit of returning back to bed, after brushing my teeth and washing my face, and I’ll end up watching a little more tv. Somehow that snowballs into four hours spent in my room still in my pjs.

I did finally manage to get myself off my ass and into the car toward Berkeley on Saturday. Thank goodness for plans. Otherwise I probably would have told myself that lying around my room for a day would be ok. I met up with Kathy at Elmwood Cafe (fav cafe in Berkeley!). It was maybe 80% talking, 20% reading, even though we had gone to a cafe so that Kathy could study for her CPA and I could … do whatever. I read this book which I started out really enjoying. But every time I put it down, I liked it less and less. I got about half way through before I finally just stopped reading it. It’s just not very compelling to read about journalists who have mid-life crises while being sent around the globe to write travel articles for magazines.


Purisima Redwoods view

HIKING. Finally. I have not gone hiking in FOREVERRRRRRRRR. I had yelped a place called Purisima Creek Redwoods last weekend. I need to keep a queue of hiking places because I think it’s an hour ordeal to find a new hiking place, figure out how to drive there, determine which trails to take, and then another hour where I go back and forth and question are there ocean views? is there enough parking? Do I have to pay? How far is this? What’s the likelihood I’ll get lost and die in the woods? Will there be shade? Is it going to be overcast? What should I wear? Do I have enough music to go hiking?

And then I spend like two hours in the morning downloading new music and filling up my ipod. Which is why so many days I start hiking around 2pm.

I don't like certain plants. But I love coastal redwoods

So I plopped into my ipod: Lana Del Rey, The Wombats, Grouplove, Birdy and Angus & Julia Stone.

Awesome mellow song of the moment: Angus & Julia Stone – For You

HOW WHY ARGH I need to follow more artists on Facebook or Twitter or something. Birdy was in SD this weekend and … WHO KNOWS when she will return to US?! I’m like … what if between now and the next time she returns to the US, she becomes Adele-levels of famous?! I wish I had gone to see her live. Rawggghhhh. Also, per my following of Shay Mitchell’s Twitter, SHE went to the concert. Double Rawggghhhh

I picked out hiking trails for a total of 10mi. I think around 7mi was when I started to think “10 mi may have been a bit much for my recovering ankle” and around 8.5mi I started thinking “walk VERY carefully because if I turn my ankle, I think I might resprain it.” I feel accomplished for finishing (well, if I hadn’t, I’d still be wandering somewhere out in the wilderness) but at the same time, kind of depressed that my entire body is sore today (Monday) and I kept waking up in the middle of the night last night because my ankle would be throbbing. I don’t think people ever appreciate good health when they have it (I certainly didn’t) and it’s frustrating to me to think that last year I could do 10 mi and feel like I just went out for a walk, but now I go on a hike and I feel worse than when I would run four or five miles straight.

Not as much ocean as Pacifica trails but still fun

I was a little afraid at first that the trails would be super crowded, as it was a 3 day weekend (not for me though) but I was able to have long stretches of solitude which was really nice. I love my team, but it’s been a while since I’ve been by myself and not have to think about work and just think about life and what I want in the future and what I would like if reality weren’t an issue.

After that, drove up to SF to hang out with Kristen. I was still in my “this book is interesting!” phase so I asked if she’d want to meet me in a cafe and read together, which she was down for (woot!) So I parked near her house then walked over to a place I had yelped, Cafe Sophia, and paid about $4 for a pot of tea. Normally I am not down for that because I could buy an entire fucking box of tea leaves for $4, but I had only eaten a banana and raspberries that entire day and it was already 4pm, and I didn’t think drinking a mocha would go well with my empty stomach. Actually, I had stopped by a bakery on the way to the cafe and scarfed down a chocolate croissant, so not empty.

We read a little after talking (Kristen: “WAIT. Should we be talking?! Shouldn’t we be saving our conversation for dinner? Let’s just read”) and then the cafe closed so we walked around and Kristen suggested eating at Criolla’s Kitchen.

Kristen: So what do you want to do for dinner?
Me: I don’t know … is there anywhere you’ve always wanted to eat?
Kristen: What’s your price range?
Me: HAHA I don’t have one, where do you want to go
Kristen: I’ve always wanted to try this place…….

I will never say no to oysters

AND IT WAS FUCKING AMAZINGGGG. I don’t want to say, I wish I lived in SF because I don’t because I like having a driveway. And by driveway, I mean, something on which I can park on, not a tiny slab of extremely slanted concrete from which I ease my car into a crazy narrow garage. But I wish there are better restaurants near where I live. I mean, in the span of three hours I pretty much randomly walked into a bakery, a cafe and a restaurant and all the food I had was delicious and the ambiance was exactly what I love and they were all within two blocks of one another. Damn you SF.

Burger with fries and an andouille sausage patty

I wrote that on Monday. It’s now Tuesday!!! My client filed on Tuesday WOOOOOTTTTT and I’ve just been doing misc tasks for other people.


Sooo tired but unwilling to sleep

Listening to: Lana Del Rey – Summertime Sadness (Reich & Bleich remix)

I did not get enough sleep last night and even though I got home from work at 10pm today, I’m still up at 1:45am. Time seems to be moving slower today, probably because my mind isn’t as fast as it would be on a fuller night’s sleep. I feel like it should actually be 3am. I need to wake up way early tomorrow because I have to go to the office before going to the client. Argh. But maybe I will make an early morning pitstop and get either McDonalds or Pinkberry for the team. And when I say I’m getting something for “the team,” what I really mean is, I buy what I want for myself but I’ll buy enough portions for more people so I can justify running through the expense as our “busy season snack money.”

I wanted to buy myself a record player as a post-busy season reward for myself. But today Kathy emailed me and asked if I’d buy a Sonos Music System, because I had once upon a time told her that one of the things I absolutely have to have in my future Seattle home was a kick ass sound system. I had always pictured having some sort of universal home stereo system that would play songs throughout all the rooms of my hypothetical home, a la Cruel Intentions when Ryan Philippe blasts music into Reese Witherspoon’s bedroom then in the indoor swimming pool. Except that movie was in 1999 and now it’s 2012 and apparently I can do the same but with wireless speakers.

This could be mine

It would be nice if I could embed their video ad that’s on their site and probably cost them thousands of dollars to produce. But there’s no code and youtube video pickings are slim.

The cost:

Bridge: $49
Amp: $499
Actual Speaker: $399
Having wireless music play from all corners of my house: $947 + tax? Holy fuck, never mind. Do not want.

I guess that’s that.

I need to plan out my weekend … like … tomorrow. From about 58 weeks of prior experience, I have learned that if I wait until Friday to make plans … nothing happens the way I envisioned on Friday morning.

I guess I’ll end the night with skimming Monday’s Pretty Little Liars.

Random pic from My Documents to end the night (I think if I start doing this on a regular basis … you will soon have a lot more insight into what I deem right click-saveable:

Shay Mitchell of PLL looking awesome!

Oh wait! Work quote!

Danny (whose new thing is to say things in a lispy voice): I’m the sweetest bitch you’ll ever meet. Oh my god. Where is that from?
Me (already laughing hysterically): UMMMM JERSEY SHORE.

Oh god. It’s 2:15. I’m already exhausted just thinking about tomorrow 7am.

Quotes and my illness

Listening to: Coldplay – Every Teardrop is a Waterfall (Avicii mix)

*me thinking “that girl is way too hot to be with that guy,” looks over at Laura*
Laura: what?
Me: … nothing
Laura: were you going to comment on how unproportional those two couples were?
Me: YES!

although the following is not at all true

Me: my mom seems to think I’m some big drunk
Laura: maybe that’s because everytime you’re back in socal, you go home drunk

Me: I realllllyyyyyy want to buy a house.
Laura: Then buy one!
Me: No … after watching a Suze Orman video on whether to rent or buy, I realized that I am probably not in the best position to buy a house yet
Laura: Don’t listen to Suze Orman. It’s ALWAYS a good idea to buy a house

at Laura’s aunt’s birthday dinner (which is not the first one I’ve been to HAHA)

Me: I can pay for dinner
Laura: No, my mom will pay. She’s her sister
Me: Well, I’m her friend!
Laura: Do you even know her NAME?
Me: NO. But I’m still her friend
Laura: Uhhh ok. Some friend
Me (to Laura’s aunt): Do YOU even know MY name?
Laura’s aunt: Yeah!
Me: REALLY?! What is it?
Laura’s aunt (to Laura’s Mom): What’s her name?
Me: SEE She doesn’t even know my name!
Jessica: Do you know MY name?
Laura’s aunt: Nope
Jessica: You don’t know my name?! I’M YOUR NIECE!

Jessica: Do you remember my name now?
Laura’s aunt: ………….
*Laura’s aunt spits soup all over the table from laughing*

And up until that day, I have never been to a Chinese restaurant where an adult (or possibly anyone) spat food out from laughing. HAHA

Laura’s mom: Wipe the take out bag! Your aunt got soup on it

I am sick. Sadness. I quarantined myself to my own room today at work and it felt very lonely. I couldn’t give major bitchface to my senior and snark at him as we both laugh our asses off, or randomly disturb Julie which is one of my new favorite things to do (on Friday I stared at her and when she continued to concentrate on her work I started saying “notice me Notice me NOTICE ME!!!” until she looked at me and said “what?” and I said “nothing” and went back to work).

BUT! My senior DID walk into the room I was in today (Monday), singsonging “Melissa isssss the best A2 EVER!” and when I laughed and said WHAT? REALLY? he stared out the window and started talking in a very serious tone “yes … I was thinking about it over the weekend … and I really do think you are my favorite A2…” which I thought was hilarious because it looked like he was just staring out the window in deep concentration as he said this

(one of the things my senior would do after I said I wanted to go home and watch the emmys was say in a flaming voice “OH MY GOD. Did you SEE what she was wearing” at random points in the day)

Julie: Did you watch the Grammys?
Me: OF COURSE. *to Danny* OH MY GAWD. Did you SEE her DRESS?!?!
Danny: I actually didn’t watch any of it. And I  got in trouble for it too. My girlfriend was on the phone with someone and I heard the word “Grammys” and thought uhoh. And then a second later she was like “DANNY. DID YOU KNOW the Grammy’s were on today?!” and I was like “ummmmmmm……… no?” So I got yelled at for keeping her from watching the Grammys.

I think I started getting sick last weekend, which was the first weekend I had a day off. That seems like FOREVER ago. Well, the sad thing is, on Monday morning you could tell EVERYONE was really sad to be back at work. I also later found out that not only had I gotten sick, Julie had gotten a little sick too and Danny had spent almost all of Superbowl Sunday puking and having feverish chills. We realized that our bodies had probably all been so stressed and pumped up to work long nights that the adrenaline kept us from feeling anything but the one day we got off work, all of our bodies crashed. LOL super sad to realize that if we don’t work, we end up getting sick. To the point that my senior was puking.

Listening to: Foster the People – Don’t Stop (the Fat Rat remix)

I went home today and when I started talking to my housemate Chris, we found out we were both sick. I said I wanted to make chicken soup to which he said YEAH let’s make chicken soup. So that of course turned into HIM making chicken soup while I watched him and asked endless questions about how to cook things. Which is really how every “cooking” experience turns out for me. HA HA I am very fortunate to always be surrounded by people who take care of me. The chicken soup was amazzzzinnggggg – chicken, bok choy, garlic, rosemary, mushrooms, carrots, celery, about 3 tbspns of chicken bouillion, chicken breast and rice. I kind of want thirds now. My other housemate came home and she’s sick too. But all three of us have not seen each other for days. So I don’t think we got it from one another. So then Chris brought down his NyQuil and we all took some pills. So it’s 10pm right now … I kind of would like to stay up to listen to my 11pm New Music Monday on the Seattle dance station but … I think I might knock out soon.

Nope. I’m ready to sleep now. Good night! At 10:11.

It’s Tuesday now…

Looks like I just closed my laptop without actually publishing it.

SO. LOOKS LIKE. I have found my CURE for illness!

Symptoms: sneezing, stuffy/runny nose, scratchy throat on the verge of becoming phlegmy

Cure: Two or three magic red and yellow pills from Taiwan. Giant pot of chicken soup with rice. One airborne. Two Nyquil pills. Nine hours of sleep. Warm shower. An apple.

Today I woke up feeling better and by the afternoon I felt close to recovery! Usually I don’t take care of myself at all and back when I lived at home, I would try to hide the fact that I was becoming ill (so my parents wouldn’t go crazy and try to feed me gross medicine, whether it be weird herbal Asian stuff or obviously expired over the counter medicine that they refused to throw away) so I would just get progressively worse and end up being sick for about two weeks. Craziness! Two day turnaround time! So … rest … and chicken soup … and drugs … work … interesting …

Now it’s VDAY. I went to the gym after work. There were a lot of people there. Apparently people think going to a smelly gym is a romantic idea? Then went grocery shopping. For some reason a TON of fruit is on sale at Safeway this week. My one sadness today is that I didn’t buy four lbs of strawberries earlier in the day, because by nighttime I had very slim pickings.

Then went to Laura’s and watched Glee.

Went home and ate a red velvet mini bundt cake my housemate Jessica gave me …

And now it’s 1am! I hope my health doesn’t regress from sleeping late tonight.

And now … a cute picture to end the post. AKA the first thing I saw on tumblr before I got bored

Things said at work #4

Listening to: Hyper Crush – Werk Me

I consider it a success when my senior says repeatedly throughout the day “I don’t know what I’m going to do on my next job … I wish you could be on all my jobs” LOL to which I replied “so you can have someone to make fun of you throughout the day?”

Senior (looking at his schedule of items to complete): Ok hopefully by the end of today, Melissa you’ll have given me opex and capital assets and I can checkmark those … Julie, you’ll give me investments and cash … and I’ll do this this and this. And we’ll have so many checkmarks! That’s my only motivation right now … these checkmarks

*later at night*

Senior: Oh my goodddd we haven’t done anything we’re so fucked
Me: WHAT?! Didn’t I give you opex and capital assets?!
Senior: Yes but —
Julie: And didn’t I give you investments and cash?!
Senior: Ok yes but … I didn’t do this and this
Me: Well it sounds to me like out of the three people in this room, you’re the only one who hasn’t accomplished anything today.

Senior Manager (sitting down next to Danny): Just … write whatever is in your heart … whatever you want to say. “Everything ties to the GL” … “everything is fine” … whatever you want.

Senior Manager: My son said the most hilarious thing yesterday. (Wife’s name) was taking a shower and he walks in and he goes “mama, I love your chest.” No wait what did he say? He said “mama, I love your chi chis” and she goes “what? why?!” and he says “because it’s so large! Mine are tiny tiny”

Julie: You two are like a bickering couple
Danny: Well at least we all know who’s the better half of this relationship
Me: WOW. Julie! Danny just admitted we have a “relationship!” I bet it took him years for him to say that about his “roommate.”

Senior Manager: JULIE. When is your wedding?! Am I invited?! Where is it going to be?!
Julie: Yeah!
Senior Manager: Does that mean I’m not invited?
Julie: No, you are!
Me: It doesn’t sound like he is … you haven’t even told him the date yet
Julie: Well, I need to get your address! And yours Danny. And I need your girlfriend’s last name for the invite
Me: Maybe you should just write “Danny + Roommate are invited” I’m sure she’ll loveee that
Danny: You two are never interacting with her. I forbid it.

Things are starting to wrap up! I don’t have any more significant modules to work on and now spend my day tying out some tax workpaper. Tying stuff out is the most rewarding in the short-term because it’s somewhat brainless and each time you tie out a number it’s like OOO! Accomplishment! But in the long-term, it’s the least rewarding because you’ll look back and realize “I spent all that time just making sure data in a workpaper was correct and I don’t even have a real conclusion on anything.”

I went to the gym today and feel like I am at the most out of shape stage of my life ever. I’m thinking about implementing 6am workouts, but I attempted that on Tuesday and just ignored my alarm clock and continued to sleep, then woke up and just watched Pretty Little Liars from my bed. HAHA

I’ve realized that there are about five stages to every major client that I am on.
1) My mad rush to complete the audit occupies all my thoughts and I feel happiest when I am the most productive. My personal life means nothing to me because I’m doing well at my job and that’s all that matters
2) I realize that I’ve gotten so used to being at the client that I expect the toilets in my house to automatically flush
3) Work loosens up as we start to wrap up and I start going home at reasonable times. I realize that even though I am now free to do whatever I want at 8pm, I have no idea what I can do and no one to really hang out with
4) I realize that I’ve just spent the past few weeks putting my personal life on pause (yet again) and I’m just getting older and nothing is really progressing with my life. Serious thoughts of quitting and just packing up and moving to Seattle ensue
5) Someone compliments me at work. I think to myself “I JUST WANT COMPLIMENTS! Will stay at job forever!”

Cycle continues.

My senior manager just forwarded this to me and my team and I’m a little sad that I find it so hilarious

OMG It’s already 1am. Sigh. Never enough time in the day

My perfect adult weekend

Listening to: Lykke Li – Tonight

I’ve pretty much accumulated a bunch of quotes over the past few days and now I will have to add in narrative in between.

As you can probably tell, I stopped doing my summaries of Week # blog posts, because towards the end of 2011 I realized that I was just blogging because I didn’t want to break my sequence, but a lot of times I wasn’t really feeling it. I also realized that I never even wrote about week #52 which was probably one of my more socially active weeks since that included TMV dinners and various SoCal outings.

BUT! This week was … pretty good! Well, my weekend was awesome. My work week was work-filled but at the time I didn’t mind.

Danny (after I played a Britney song on my laptop): Don’t you know … Britney’s back. I’ll support Britney. I’ll occupy Britney. Wait. That sounded really bad

Danny (talking about a cup of peanuts that was next to Julie’s laptop): Watch out you’re going to hit your nuts
Julie and me: -_____________-
Danny: WHAT
Danny: What are you talking about?! I WAS NOT you two are just SO IMMATURE
Me: You had that gleeful tone in your voice. I know you did that on purpose.

Me: I don’t get what the point of this was at all. I just basically said something was reasonable and there’s no real proof for it at all. Like, what the fuck do I know about whether this Company is going to make as much as they project?
Danny: You sound exactly like Ashley did when I thought to myself ‘she is going to quit within 3 months’
Me: What?!!? What did she say?
Danny: So this was after she had to sit and go through all of the calculations with the client. Then she gets back the module, no joke, with maybe 100 review notes. And she comes back into the room and just goes off: “WHAT THE FUCK IS THE POINT OF ALL THIS?! I am just tracing one FUCKING number to ANOTHER FUCKING number! This is so fucking stupid! I’m just looking at ONE piece of paper to another piece of paper.” That’s what you sound like right now.

Danny: Do you want to see what Ashley texted me? I texted her and told her that the client yelled at me and cursed at me on Friday. She wrote ‘hahaha that is not ok. Don’t worry she will get what is coming to her one day. Do you want me to go and show her what’s up?”

Me: Hey Danny? So … I changed the expectations and it’s not as detailed and is kind of covering up some of the year’s activities but I think it’ll be less confusing … just wanted to check if that’s ok …
Danny: You know what you’re asking me at a very vulnerable state right now so … I’ll look at it later
Me: What do you mean vulnerable state
Julie: He’s in emotional distress after his convo with the client
Danny: Yeah. Pretty much
Me: Oh …………… in that case …………….. can we work in a café on Saturday?
Danny: This will be rejection #……. I don’t even know. No, we are not going to a fucking cafe.

*So my senior refuses to download spotify even though Julie loves it after my convincing her to get it*
Senior: Damn it, I thought I hit pause on Pandora. Now I am listening to the tail end of a song I like.
Me: What song
Senior: Something by The Doors. I wish I could hit rewind
Me: You know, I can press rewind on spotify just fine
Senior: I don’t want to  fucking hear it

Me: Julieeeeee I can’t work today
Julie: That’s what you said yesterday!
Me: DID I?!
Julie: Yeah you said “today is not a day for working” as you stared at the ceiling for several minutes

*So I made the mistake of telling my team what my SAT score was which my senior has never been able to stop making fun of me about*

Danny: Melissa scored perfect, nyanh nyah nyah
Me: Ok, that was … random. And I didn’t score perfect. I was 40 points off.
Julie: That’s pretty close. that was that, top 1%?
Me: I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. It was over ten years ago. Now I’m just an average employee
Julie: Omg don’t say that to kids! Killing their dreams
Me: I’m just one of many employees in this GT office, which is one of many GT offices, which is just one of many accounting firms. That score didn’t mean anything for my future.

Me: How can clearing review notes take so long?!
Danny: …. I had a comment … but I’m going to hold it in
Me: Yeah that’d be nice.
Danny: Yeah it will be. For about ten minutes. And then I’m going to let it rip!

Me: I feel sick. Should I go home and nap or go and buy fruits?
Julie: omg GO SLEEP
Danny: Don’t buy fruit. Fruit is bad
Me: WHAT are you talking about
Danny: UHHHH have you ever heard of something called THE BIBLE? Well there’s a story in it. It’s about a man, a woman, a snake, and an apple. And the gist of the story is, fruit is sin.
Me: Oh god.
Danny: Fruit is what led us all to this horrible existence. Fruit is what caused me to be sitting in this horrible conference room on a Saturday afternoon auditing. Fruit is the root of all evil. Maybe if they had eaten fried chicken, we wouldn’t be here right now

I have absolutely no idea what time I went home on Monday. Honestly, what happened this past Wednesday feels like it happened weeks ago. But Tuesday, I know we left early at 8pm and I ended up going rock climbing with my manager. I did about six? top roping courses and it was nice to be rock climbing again but it’s also VERY demoralizing to realize that a freaking 5.9 that would have been a piece of cake before is now difficult for me. I’m still very scared that I’ll put too much weight on my left ankle and fuck it up again.

Finally on Wednesday, my senior and manager finally realized how freaking terrible of an idea it was to be leaving “early” (ie. 8 or 9) and we resumed working late again … except now instead of leaving at 12am we would leave at 12:30 am. LOLLLLLL Really all I can do is laugh at this point. Friday we left early at six pm and I had no idea what to do! So I called/texted people and came close to a “OH MY GOD NO ONE IS FREE TO HANG OUT WITH ME I NEED NEW FRIENDS!” crisis but thankfully Kristen was free and I made her realize that when I said “want to hang out?” I would never mean “let’s go clubbing” and would only want to eat out.

So I drove up to SF around 7pm and then after circling her block about three times, finally found parking. Then we walked over to a TINY TINY sushi restaurant called Eiji’s. I haven’t had sushi in SOOOOOOOOO effing long I was really craving some damn good sushi. Which is what I got! I got white tuna carpacchio which I heart, grilled black cod, some Alaskan roll and some spanish mackerel. Even though I was already crazy full, I looked at the dessert menu and it looked so cute and I’ve only been eating boring ice cream lately that I was like OOO I want something!

The mochi kyoto style was AMAZING. Cinnamon + green tea ice cream = genius

omg I just went through my camera photos and realized I have a tonnnn of pics from winter break that I never uploaded anywhere. Shit. Well … don’t expect them until after my company files which will be end of February …

After dinner, where I somehow ended up dropping about $50 on a single meal (I NEED to realize that I can’t just spend my money mindlessly the few times I go out), we went back to Kristen’s and watched 50/50 which I really liked. I’d totally buy the movie when it’s $7.50 or lower at Target. ❤ Anna Kendrick! In fact, I kind of want to watch Up in the Air right now. The crazy thing is that there was this flash of the city locale for a second and I said “HEY I think that’s Seattle!” and I don’t think they ever showed the Seattle Center (Space Needle) because they’d probably have to pay some ridiculous amount to get that shot, but I was so certain that the setting was in Seattle … until I JUST googled it and found out that while the film was set in Seattle, it was actually filmed in Vancouver. LOL I don’t know what that says about my mind … that I can recognize a fake-Seattle?

Anyway … Saturday I went to work again BUT this was the FIRST weekend that I DID NOT work BOTH days on the weekend! So basically, I had worked for 27 days straight, at least eight hours a day. LOLLLLLLLLLLLL

Saturday night!!! So after work I went home and napped for about ten minutes before driving up to Kathy’s house in Danville for a REUNION!!! With my old team that worked at the Moraga client – me, Kathy, Marina, and our client Sarah. It was our WINE NIGHT which is something I have ALWAYS wanted to do. Sit around, drink wine with friends, make dinner, talk about life!!! ❤ It’s like I’m on an episode of COUGAR TOWN! (back on ABC on 2/14!)

Marina: Here choose one
Me: …. I don’t wear earrings
Marina: These aren’t earrings …. they’re for your wine glass
Me: Oh.

Mel's favorite alcoholic beverages: ciders, white wine sangria, and mimosas

So Sarah, Kathy and I are single while Marina has been in a long-term relationship. So while a lot of hilarious things were said about our being single and being fed up with how hard it is to meet people when we work all the time … Marina’s comments about her relationship were just ridiculously funny

Kathy: God I just want to skip to the being married part
Marina: You know, after all the warm fuzzy stuff wears off … all you’re really left with is … the power to control. Honestly, I think the best relationships are where the guy just does everything the girl says
Sarah: My aunt and uncle’s relationship is exactly like that. Happiest couple I’ve ever met.

Marina: So the thing is, for the past few weeks I have been controlling what he eats and he doesn’t even know it! I’m making him lunches and dinners of healthy foods and he comes up to me on Friday and is like, pinching his stomach going, ‘you know, I think I’m getting trimmer!’ I”m thinking ‘no shit, of course you’re getting thinner, I’m practically spoonfeeding you!
Marina: Breakfast, green foods shake. Pre lunch snack, carrots. Lunch, salad. Mid afternoon snack, broccoli. Dinner, another salad.
Me: I can’t believe a guy would actually eat that consistently
Marina: It just dawned on me one day, that I have so much control over him. He just doesn’t even know it. I just say to him “hey, I’m making lunch and dinner, I’ll pack one for you too” and he’s GRATEFUL for it, he’s just like “oh thanks!”
Me: omg that’s awesome
Marina: The thing is, the second after I started making more money than him, I was just like, well if this is the path we’re heading down where I make more money than you … you gotta be trimmer then. You can’t make less money than me and still be tubby.

Kathy: We just gotta go to some bars and meet people
Sarah: You go to a bar in Danville, you’re just going to end up dating a porn star

(true story for her)

Marina: So my brother is potentially moving out … and my boyfriend’s rental house is about to be foreclosed so he’s looking for a place to live. So …… logically … I told him “you know … you could just move into that room and live in this house and he freaking says ‘No, I kind of want to continue living with my friends.’ He didn’t even look at me when he said it! And then a week goes by and he emails me FROM HIS FREAKING WORK EMAIL to MY work email, and it says, this is verbatim, “I was thinking it might be fun to live together.” It took him a freaking week to figure out, hmm maybe living with my slobby friends isn’t such a great idea
Me: I don’t know! Guys just think about the present, he’s not thinking long term
Marina: Well at the rate he’s going, in a few months he’ll be homeless on the streets of SF

Marina: We’re totally different people from when we first started dating. It’s like, a relationship with three different people, before college, after college, then work. I feel like once we BOTH started work, that was when the real relationship began. The only thing that’s stayed constant for the past six years is the car he drives. And he’s considering selling it! I was like ‘you can get a new car, but don’t sell your old car! Without that car … we have nothing!'”

Kathy: HOW are all these people MARRIED. I just … ARGH!
Sarah: You know why? Because all these women who are married are not dominant, they do whatever the guy tells them to do, and because they’re dirty whores

Loveeee them 🙂 We are always awed that the four of us are friends because if it had not been for work, none of us really think we would be friends because we are SO different yet … now that we all know each other it’s hard to imagine not being friends with them. I feel like they’re my most feminine group of friends because we’ve gotten mani/pedis together and we plan to have spa days and … come on, wine night is pretty girly.

I ended up staying a little longer to help Kathy clean up because I just enjoy hanging out with her. I somehow ended up leaving her place at 2am which meant getting home at 3am. WORTH IT.

AND AMAZING. NO WORK ON SUNDAY! Although I realized it is somehow slightly more depressing to think “sigh. I have to go to work tomorrow.” Whereas before I never had that thought because I literally went to work every day. Grass is always greener, seriously.

I think the saddest part about wine night was when I would tell stories that started with “and then the partner said we had to leave early so we ended up leaving at 9pm” and everyone would laugh at me and I would be like “what?” and the response would be “… 9pm … early? I’m like, in bed at 9pm” And also when Marina informed me that apparently my team is NOTORIOUS now as being the most overworked team.

Me: WHAT?! I thought this was normal! Isn’t everyone else working these hours?
Marina: NO! Everyone is leaving at like 7 or 8! I don’t know why YOUR team is working so much but all of us are like, damn … how are they working so much…

Sigh. When I was a first year, the most overworked person in my class was Justine and I always thought to myself, well, no matter how bad it gets at least I don’t work as much as her. Now I realize SHIT. I WORK MORE THAN HER. I AM THE NEW JUSTINE. People are probably pitying ME now! I subscribe to Marina’s philosophy of “I would never ever want to be the top utilized person in the firm. I strive to be the lowest” because honestly it gets you NOWHERE. So that was a very depressing wake up call, to realize I am working more than others. Sigh!

Sunday: Woke up and talked to my mom on the phone before getting out of bed at just the right time before I’d be late to brunch at my ex-manager’s house in Fremont. Sometimes when I talk to my mom I realize how … odd the English language is

Mom: C-A-T-H-Y. How do you pronounce that? CATH like cake or CATH like cat?
Me: Like cat. Cathy
Mom: ok. Then, K-A-T-I-E. How do you pronounce that?
Me: Like cake. Katie.

I totally don’t think about how inconsistent English is until she asks me how to pronounce things and I realize there is no rhyme or reason to anything.

Anyway. So I drove to Amy’s where me, Julia and Amy carpooled to my friend/old manager Eunice’s house in Fremont. She was the manager at my Moraga client and somehow she thought I was hilarious and I think she is hilarious so I love being her friend. I wrote her a christmas card and she said she was reading it and thought it was the most entertaining card ever. Anyway, when she was having her goodbye party and in the process of leaving the firm I was always like EUNICE WE MUST HANG OUT and she’d say “yeah you can come over to my house” BUT NEVER gave me her address! I even said to her once “you know, you keep saying that but you NEVER tell me where you live” and she just laughed. But she finally gave in, after I essentially coerced her into it.

So she and her husband cooked up this delicious mushroom spinach thing, along with giant bowls of fruit and mimosas and some kind of egg potato scramble. I felt like I was eating brunch in SF, it looked so healthy and cute … except there weren’t strangers a foot from my table, and her husband put on Pandora on a hip hop station so it was freaking hilarious to be sitting around eating our classy little brunch in her cute apartment, off her Kate Spade wedding silverware and crazy nice dishware and sipping our mimosas while Kid Cudi and Eminem and 50 cent would be playing in the background.

Now I want to be engaged so I can start putting things on a wedding registry

Eunice: But you want to stay at least one year as a senior to get the managerial experience because other firms will value that, even if it’s not accounting
Me: yeah but … why do I need to get managerial experience at an accounting firm? I could get managerial experience at so many other places without having to go through so much shit
Amy: Yeah but you have to be in a hostile environment. The best soldiers are out in Afghanistan. I don’t think the soldiers out in … Idaho are learning anything

And it was hilarious to me to when Kathy and Marina came in and they started raving about the Jason Wu Target launch this morning with Amy. Amy, who had gone to Target at 8:15 to scoop up as many things as she could to resell.

So that’s adult thing #2 I always want to do with friends: mimosas and homemade brunch in the morning!!! Also, the idea of using fancy silverware that someone picked out once upon a time as a part of their wedding registry. CUTENESS.

Kathy: When I moved to America, I would watch Clueless and learn English that way
Me: Clueless?!!?! Omg everything makes soooo much sense now


And THEN adult thing #3 was superbowl party which I always love! Except the real dream is to one day host my own superbowl party but that won’t be happening until I move to Seattle. This year it was at Laura’s and her sister basically smoked meat for the entire day and around half-time it was done and it was DELISH.

Giant slabs of meat and a light salad. A typical Kuo family dinner

After the Superbowl I went to Sprouts with Laura to get my groceries for the week. I have lived the past two weeks VERY unheathily and it took a reunion with Kathy and Marina to remind me that I need to EAT HEALTHY and EXERCISE because there THEY are eating fucking chia seeds and making green shakes and salads for meals while I sit around eating pints of ice cream for the hell of it. HAHA

So yes. I thought this weekend was awesome. I felt productive and useful at work. But I was able to squeeze in a LOT of fun time on the weekend (even despite working one of my weekend days!) How do I feel? Well, besides awesome, I think I may be getting sick from my lack of sleep.

AGHHHH It’s 11:59! Perfect time to post this and close my eyes and prepare myself for another week~

Quotes from work #3

Listening to 1: Flo-Rida ft Sia – Wild One (LOL if she becomes famous because she paired up with David Guetta and Flo-Rida)
Listening to 2: Natalia Kills ft. Far East movement – Lights Out (HAHAHA lyrics I’ve got a masters in boyology)

I got out of work today at 12:20. Got home and showered. Started this blog at 12:35. The sad thing is that I’m so wired and ready to work and just want to get shit done that I wish I could have stayed later but I was being forced to leave.

Since I don’t have time to legitimately grocery shop and certainly not cook anymore, every few days I’ll make a morning trip to Safeway because I’ll realize that I seriously have ZERO food to eat. Like, this week, I found a bag of bread I’d kept frozen since Thanksgiving and brought it to work for my breakfast. BREAKFAST! I almost always have some sort of suitable breakfast food. Not anymore!

Anyway, I don’t like eating frozen food and I don’t have the means to cook when I’m at work, so “grocery shopping” really just entails buying a giant bottle of Naked juice that I portion over four days, and ice cream. The ice cream, I think, is ingenious because whenever something frustrating or stressful arises at work, I just stand up, get my ice cream, sit back down. It calms me down, and it makes everyone in the audit room laugh.

Due to my severe lack of food, I may or may not have used ice cream bars as a form of breakfast … and lunch … one day.

Me: I bought them at Safeway! Six for only $5!!!
Manager: Oh wow that’s pretty good! Plus they’re Haagen Dazs so it’s good quality!
Senior: At the rate you’re eating them though, you might as well just buy a flat of them at Costco
Me: OH MY GOD I can’t believe you’d say that to a woman! You’re a horrible person.

Senior: So … I said something to my roommate (by which he means, girlfriend) last night that pissed her off and I realize now why it might not have been such a good idea to say it
All of us: Sigh. What did you say?
Senior: No, you’re all going to yell at me if I tell you
Me: Just tell us. You already started the story
Senior: So I’m sitting on the couch, eating my bag of taquitos and I realize that my backlog of taquitos is GONE. I always make sure to keep at least two bags of taquitos in the freezer. But I haven’t had time to go to the grocery store. So I said to my roommate “you know, why can’t you do your womanly duties and maintain my taquitos supply.” To which she replied, “you can go to hell.” And then I spent the rest of the night quietly eating my taquitos

*cue all of our simultaneous responses, in level of our general vulgarity*
A1 (Renee): Danny that’s so mean of you!
S1 (Julie): OH MY GOD I can’t believe you said that to her
Manager: I hope she told you to go fuck yourself

So my senior went to Cal Poly and apparently during the day it suddenly became wildfire on FB Newsfeed (only for Cal Poly alumni though) that they were …

Senior: Guess what school is the sixth most selective school
Me: … no fucking way. YOUR school? What’s your source
Senior: I just saw this pop up on facebook. It goes, Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Stanford, Cal Poly.
Me: UM. One of those things is NOT like the others

*cue 30 minutes of us making snarky comments back and forth about each other’s schools for fun, such as*

Senior: You know what, Berkeley’s allllllll the way down there on the list. Accepting at 24%. I guess they just let ANYONE in. Like people who just chain themselves up to trees

Senior: I think I’m going to have to be more … selective … about how I choose things from now on. From now on I’m going to only choose 16% of my options because … I have a legacy to uphold

Me: You know what. I can see why you’re so proud of this moment. Your school doesn’t get that many glory moments. So I’ll give you this one

Senior: You know what. I didn’t get rejected by Berkeley. I rejected Berkeley
Me: …did you even apply?!
Senior: Yeah. My grandparents forced me to because they were Berkeley alumni.
Senior: They said they would pay for my college if I got in, and my parents were like FUCK YEAH You better apply!
Me: WHAT why didn’t you go?! IT’S FREE
Senior: Oh, I didn’t get in.

And then … just because I like to make my senior roll his eyes

A1: Who’s playing in the Superbowl?
Me: The NY Giants and  the Patriots
A1: Who’s the quarterback on the Giants? …… Pey…..ton?
Me: Eli Manning
A1: hahaha are you rooting for the Giants?
*senior rolls his eyes at me*
A1: Who’s on the Patriots?
Me: Gisele Bundchen’s Hunkalicious Husband, Tom Brady *beams at senior*
Senior: Neither of them deserve to win

And … now it’s 1am