Thanksgiving

Yesterday was one of those “wake up and never have time to just sit around” days that I love. I’m surprisingly not too exhausted – I woke up at 9:30 today after sleeping around 4:30am and am watching Knocked Up because I realized that I had completely forgotten what happens in the movie.

First I went shopping with my mom at Santa Anita. People always say “don’t go to Santa Anita to shop!” but I think I am more likely to buy something there than anywhere else. Although maybe a part of that is because I go shopping with my mom and her credit card at Santa Anita, whereas I pay with my own money at other places … I shopped from 8:30am-1pm. My favorite buy … probably Bandolino boots that turned out to be $30 cheaper than I expected.

Then I ate some Thanksgiving leftovers at home THEN 30 minutes later went to Ichima with Frances C and Danny. I LOVEEE Ichima. I don’t think I could ever like a roll more than the Ichima roll. Tuna, salmon and yellowtail in one roll. Every time I eat one, I think of how Owen described it as “melts in your mouth.” It’s the perfect description.

We drove around a Best Buy parking lot, meaning we went down one aisle before giving up. We spent more time trying to get out of the parking lot than looking for a space. There wasn’t really anything I would have wanted … I think this year there hasn’t been a particularly new and exciting technology released that people would rush out for. Maybe companies are holding back until consumers are more willing to spend. Or maybe we’ve run out of ideas.

I tried to buy a yogurt pie from Ace Yogurt, but I have no idea what flavor is the one I have had before, so we left. A little sad because that yogurt store seems so desolate all the time. I wonder how they pay for rent and utilities. Then went to Danny’s and we watched Role Models and some people joined us but I had to leave around 6pm for a family dinner. I got to eat delicious ice cream at Danny’s though. I ended up falling asleep during the end of Role Models. The only good part of that movie is Jane Lynch (which can be said of many of the projects she takes on).

After dinner, Costco with the family – I almost forgot to buy oatmeal which would have made me so mad. Usually I love seeing aisles of Christmas merchandise in Costco but this year I didn’t care as much. When we went home, Owen’s car was waiting to pick me up and go to downtown Pasadena for barhopping! I was really surprised and delighted to open the minivan door and realize it was completely full with a space for me to squeeze into. It was a familiar feeling that I haven’t felt in a long time. Very reminiscent of Danny’s minivan, the original traveling minivan. So off we went to Pasadena…

We went to Bar Celona, Hot Wings (because Danny was hungry), Barney’s Beanery and then some Japanese place. FUNNN. We got a pitcher of margarita something at the first place – and spent a long time figuring out whether the songs played actually matched the music videos on the screen. They did not. The drink tasted like juice but I still turned red. Danny said “it’s hard to take you seriously when you look like a tomato. With hair. And glasses.” We got a pitcher of Blue Moon at Hot Wings and some wings which I didn’t eat. There, we started playing “The Game of Life” or questions. THANKS to OWEENNN for the idea! It was the best.

Basically we would just go around and ask each other questions – everyone has to answer the question. We start off with easy questions (Owen: What’s your favorite movie) then get more personal. Thinking back, I enjoyed the not-so-personal ones too. It was interesting to hear people’s favorite drinks and celebrity crushes and stuff. Once we finished our beer, we moved on and searched for the next place.

Here is Danny and Alvin trying on Jackie’s lip balm.

Barney’s Beanery we went into because Jackie saw a foosball table. It was too loud to continue questions, but we got to play pool and foosball. We didn’t share drinks here … it felt very college bar like. Whereas Bar Celona was more of a bar-lounge feel. Hot Wings is the classic sports watching venue which is a good atmosphere too. Our last stop, the Japanese place, is for eating and there’s a dance floor and it was happy hour. We got a very good variety of drinking venues yesterday night. Also, Jackie looked over and realized that in a private room that was fairly seethrough, there was a naked woman lying on the table and people were eating sushi off of her. Which is not something I would expect in Pasadena, which I thought was a fairly wholesome place to go … but it was hilarious that we had to make Jackie shout out “THERE’S A NAKED LADY IN THAT ROOM AND PEOPLE ARE EATING SUSHI OFF OF HER” about six times because it was so hard to hear over the music.

Before we got to our last stop, the Japanese place, we had walked around looking for the next place to go. We stumbled upon a taco truck and it was DELICIOUS. SOOO good. Carne Asada taco, with a cute little lemon slice

Back to Japanese place – we did sake bombs (Danny and I only did one) and got some random appetizers. Owen ordered a bunch and no one wanted any. Right after we took sake bombs though, everyone grabbed their moist chopsticks and went for one. Jackie and I wanted to ask the DJ to play Taylor Swift but I can’t imagine they would have said yes. It was not at all the environment for Taylor Swift.

We decided to go home but as we neared Arcadia I think all of us were thinking “NOOO DON’T LET THIS NIGHT END” so I wanted to eat JITB. Danny drove all the way to one, and it was drive through only so we were like NEH NO. So he drove to another one, and it was closed! And we were about to give up, but then we went to Denny’s and continued questions. Well, Alvin ended up sleeping on Carolyn and drooling on her. HAHA

Back in senior year of high school I remember we were REALLY into asking each other questions. Most of our get-togethers would consist of us just coming up with hypothetical situations/questions and it would entertain us until like 3am or 4am. I think after college started, when we had get-togethers we didn’t ask each other so many questions. I also thought that, kind of like in tv shows, when we got together we would just share stories about college. But I realized that doesn’t really happen because it’s hard to describe a situation when people don’t know the people you’re talking about and can’t relate to some of the experiences. I kind of thought we had asked each other so many questions that we no longer had anymore questions. But I guess four years later, most people have new experiences and (except for ME) the questions aren’t so hypothetical anymore.

Some questions … I can remember mine more easily. I asked stuff like … what’s your favorite drink (Hot Wings), what’s your type (Japanese), what food would you like to eat off someone’s body (Japanese), if you could ask anyone at this table a question and they had to answer it, what would it be (Denny’s), when did you realize you were in love (Denny’s) and … I’m pretty sure we had two or three rounds at Denny’s but I don’t remember what else I asked. Other questions I remember … who is your celebrity crush, who would you like to be reincarnated as (I loved how it started off with “I want to be a people person, someone people really like” and it ended with Carolyn saying “OPRAH” and Danny and I saying “TAYLOR SWIFT!”). What was your first kiss like, what was your best date, turn-off, turn-on (EVERYONE LAUGHED AT MINE), if you could only eat one food for the rest of your life what would it be, biggest regret in a relationship, would you do a threesome, where would you most like to have sex, most explicit thing you’ve ever done (Owen’s – hilarious. NO WAIT OMFG OWEN’S FIRST KISS. THAT. WAS HILARIOUS), umm, most illegal thing you’ve ever done (not too scandalous), are you happy with your life (I was the only one who said YES so take that, people who think I am depressed inside!), what is one thing you think about TMV that you have never said, who is someone you disliked at first then later liked better, biggest fear … I think it’s pretty incredible that I remembered all of those questions. HAHA

We also did some personality thing that Owen asked – answer the questions 1) what is your favorite animal 2) what is your favorite color 3) what is your favorite body of water 4) if you had a goblet of anything, what would it be and how much would you fill it up and 5) what is your favorite food. Just as a reminder, Carolyn’s answer for #5 was “pringles – cheap, easy, and homey” and mine was “grapes – green, seedless, and sweet.” I also said for #3, the Pacific Ocean – west, salty, and large. Someone said that we had played this game before and I had also said Pacific Ocean. I can’t believe we had played this game before and I have no recollection of it at all HAHA

Around 3:30 we left Denny’s and had to drag a passed out Alvin to the car. I’m glad that in four years we’ve learned that the easiest way to carry a drunk person is NOT lifting each of his limbs off the ground and carrying him like a dead animal (as in, Connie’s July 4th bbq), but to have him slump against someone and limp out together. HAHA Got dropped off … I went home, found out we had A PRETTY BAD LOSS for the volleyball game omfg, checked blogs, and ended the night talking to Kristen in Australia (she imed “a bit late for you to be up” HAHA) and finally went to bed with my hair smelling like Denny’s. What a good night.

I woke up today and my mom noticed the “yes you’re 21” stamp on my hand and flipped out because she thought I had gotten a tattoo. A crooked, blue tattoo of a thumbs up on the back of my right hand -__- ALSO I signed up for a credit card today. It’s like a student credit card or something and I am a little sad I didn’t sign up for it in Berkeley so that I could have had a pretty Cal credit card. Wow it’s already 1:30, I think we are leaving at 4pm. SADNESS. I wonder what TMV will do tonight. But tomorrow I will be playing with Laura. OMFG I WAS SUPPOSED TO RESEARCH FOR MY PAPER! I’m going to just pack, watch Knocked Up, and think about my paper tomorrow go eat shaved ice with Henry and Frances, and then wait to get picked up and leave for Berkeley. HAPPY THANKSGIVING! My last thanksgiving break as a college student! (Although it doesn’t seem like Soo Jin, Janie, or Albert’s Thanksgiving changed much since they started working)

Thanksgiving Shopping

I want to buy SOOO MANYYY THINGSSSSSS

For many years I have imagined what I’d have in my home when I graduated from college. No more mismatched dinnerware and take what you can get furniture. Dispose of all the things my mom had fished out of the hallway closet for me before I left for school. Now, it’s Thanksgiving and I see sales  EVERYWHERE and I know I’m going to be living independently next year September … so I kind of want to buy EVERYTHING now and store it in my room until I depart for SJ.

In the last two years I’ve bought for myself and set aside: 4 yellow salad plates from Target, 1 glass carafe and 6 ceramic mugs from the Crate and Barrel outlet. It’s a meager start, but they are all things I really love and hope no one will ever break.

In addition to this, I so want to redo my wardrobe. There are only a few things I like and would keep if I had the choice of completely starting anew. You can probably envision them in your head, since I constantly rewear clothes. I like my 2 pairs of boots, the straight leg jeans I’m currently wearing, 2 black peacoats, my Cal sweatshirt, my UC Berkeley pj pants, my Costco socks, my random assortment of free underwear I’ve accumulated from Victoria’s Secret, the black “edgy” jacket I bought from Wet Seal, my H&M blazer, my bright blue zip up hoodie, and a black long sleeve from Target.

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I just came back from shopping with Connie. My legs are so tired. I bought three long sleeves from Target. I realized something in the dressing room. Every time I go shopping, I only pick tops to try on that are of the following colors: white, yellow, grey, and black.

Today I found five fairly similar long-sleeve tops. I left with three. Can you guess which three?

The only colors I EVER buy are black, grey, and dark blue. I ALWAYS bring something white or yellow into the dressing room, I have no idea why because white is not a flattering color in general and yellow doesn’t go well with my skin color. Nevertheless, ALWAYS those colors! I think my favorite color is actually yellow. I realized this because I was looking through wedding ideas and this was my favorite color scheme:

So effing cute.

Another thing I ALWAYS do: I ALWAYS go into jcrew even though I never ever get anything because 1) nothing compliments my style, my skin tone, or my size and 2) it’s pretty expensive. I have no idea why I am drawn to jcrew every time – I think it may have something to do with how white it is and how I am so easily drawn to things white people like.

Maybe I’m in a more observant mood. While shopping today I kept noticing people and I think I’m becoming more aware of LA vs. SF differences. For my own taste, I think I really love the outfits that people wear in SF and in Berkeley (sometimes I just want to sit at Kroeber Fountain or Memorial Glade and watch people walk by and take notes on their outfits) but I think people wear makeup better in LA. Or … maybe SF makeup is more natural while LA makeup is more dramatic but not excessively so. I may only like SF outfits more because I love layers, and I do not appreciate baggy tshirts or denim skirts with boots.

First day of Thanksgiving break: I’m +4 garments. Let’s see what Friday brings.

Kate Moss stole my saying!

One of People’s top celebrity quotes this week is Kate Moss saying “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.” I TOTALLY WROTE THAT ON MY INSPIRATIONAL DIET FLASHCARD!

My saying is not verbatim – it says “nothing tastes better than feeling thin,” but OMG she stole that from me!

I am half amused that I have the same mindset as one of the highest paid models and half saddened that despite having the same life philosophy, I am still my tubular self.

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I no longer have anything to say. Um, this weekend was Soo Jin’s birthweek!

Apparently when you google “Love at First Bite cupcakes” my blog comes up. Good god. Well, now Soo Jin’s face will come up.

We went to Red Robin’s and stuffed our faces. Red Robin is to Soo Jin like Souplantation to me – you go more for the tradition and memories than for the actual food. Then we went back to Tiffany’s/Li-Ting’s for ice cream and pinata bashing, but Soo Jin didn’t want to destroy her pinata. Instead, it now watches over her living room. I spent the next morning panicking in their living room because I couldn’t do any work and I hadn’t exercised that morning. Once Soo Jin woke up at the early hours of 2pm, we went to Ikea. Ikea is fun to walk around when you don’t have anything in particular to buy. It feels like you must have everything they sell. But whenever I actually have a list of things to get, I don’t really like any of it. Suddenly the mass produced items seem to go with nothing, kind of like an one size fits all article of clothing. Plus, I’d rather pay more for something I don’t have to construct myself, because the process of constructing it, while self empowering, sort of cheapens the product.

Then back to SF for ramen. THEN clubbing. We were supposed to go to Infusion, but the line was super long so we walked to another one. I think the main reason Vegas is such a party city is because you can wear skimpy clothes at 2am and you still don’t feel cold. Waiting in line in any other city puts a damper on the evening because you’re standing there shivering. Our cab driver to the club seemed very nice. He told us a joke and we politely laughed. I am very anti-clubbing but I had fun. It just made me really want to go to a gay club. I like house music, but it would be more fun to dance to popular music. The DJ last night seemed to really like David Guetta, which is ok. The only popular song he played was Sexy Bitch, and you’d think from everyone’s reaction he would play more popular music, but he just went back to lyricless house music. I was very put off by the guy:girl ratio there, especially when guys just come up behind us and dance. I somehow seem to find myself in a conversation with people I absolutely do not want anything to do with. At least this time, Laura and Soo Jin pulled me away, UNLIKE MY BIRTHDAY.

Judging by my personal judging of people, I feel like the main thing to do for clubbing is to make your hair amazing. It’s too dark to really appreciate anyone’s makeup. And clothing makes a difference but if you dance enthusiastically, you can pretty much wear anything and it looks like you’re pulling it off.

We drove back and I liked how the cab driver went real quick. My legs were so tired. We were there for three hours. Because of the way I dance, that’s essentially saying that I stood for three hours. I’m glad no one knew the club closed at 4am because we left a little before 2. Went home, some people snacked but I didn’t. Went to sleep then woke up and ate all the cookies I bought from Ikea before heading back to Berkeley. I kind of wanted to blow off my 5:00 group meeting but I also felt very unproductive. And I don’t think I could ever purposefully ditch a meeting for personal reasons. I kind of wish I had stayed in SF though – it’s 3pm which means we’d probably be getting ready to go to “brunch” now and later watch New Moon. I think I’ll take the bus to 4th street and shop around, then group meeting, then sit around some more!

Two days of class, I’m going to go to 1/4 of the classes, then THANKSGIVING OH GOD. I need to work on my paper … and other than that, I have NOTHING TO EVER CARE ABOUT FOR SCHOOL! I have finals but once I decided to shoot for B’s in my classes, that pretty much means my maximum effort is showing up for the finals. It’s funny because last week was the only time in my life I have ever felt completely stress-free, but somehow, going to SF ignited all this stress in me because now I feel like I was failing to do something while having fun. That is how my mind works.

Realizations

1. The printer I’ve had for two years does COPIES. I never knew … so I’m copying my employment contracts now. I just saved myself $1.00. Love it.  Technology is so amazing … the idea that this printer can SCAN a document, then PRINT it as a COPY. So that’s why this giant contraption on my desk says “printer scanner copier”

2. The H&M blazer I’ve had for four years has a removable belt! I’ve only worn the blazer once, and that one time I wore it, I got some sort of liquid foundation on it and there is a very small but annoying stain on my left boob. I didn’t like wearing it because of the stain, and because I hated having to tie the belt because it made unflattering shapes with my stomach. But Saturday I realized the belt is totally removable! So I colored in the stain with a black sharpie, and now I’m good to go

3. I’ve somehow ended up getting everything I had hoped for and more. All my regrets have washed away. The only way life could be improved is if I weren’t single and I had Yvonne Strahovski’s abs. Regardless, at this moment, life is perfect.

And so begins a slight, hopefully unnoticeable filtering of the thoughts I hastily post onto this blog. I don’t want to get fired for anything.

I need to plan out how I’m going to spend my paychecks. HAHA overeager much? I used to have a bookmarked article on my old laptop that suggested what you should be spending. I just remember that people should be spending 28% of their paycheck on housing. I forgot how much is supposed to be saved. It’s surprising how hard it is to find a decent article that reasoanbly suggests a smart way to spend your paycheck. I always think about what I want to do in the future – little things like, what would I furnish my apartment with? Where do I want to live? What am I going to do on the weekends? Where am I going to gym? It’s weird because now, those questions aren’t so much fantasies anymore, but actual planning.

I don’t have to worry about health insurance … I don’t have to feel guilty when I spend money … I don’t have to care about my GPA ever again. It feels quite good, especially a month before finals.

The Last Hurrah

Today was our NorCal holiday dinner, and unbeknownst to most of us, our farewell dinner to Tiffany. Lucy and I barted over to Daly City to eat another feast prepared solely by Tiffany. I made cards for people, in between my tax project and wasting time. I spent 1 1/2 hours last night purely drawing, and 30 minutes before leaving for the bart station scribbling some stream of consciousness onto each one. They were a good source of laughter. I aim to please.

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All images I drew inspiration from by googling “Thanksgiving clip art.” If you google it, you’re bound to find the image that I attempted to imitate, if you go through about 15 pages.

We watched the Cal vs. Arizona State game while Tiffany slaved away in the kitchen 😀 At some point we started eating chips and dip that Angel had left out for us – quite good even though I knew each layer was just a layer of increasing unhealthiness. Once the game ended, the feast began!

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I don’t know the names for everything but it’s essentially 1) creamed spinach, 2) buttered squash and yams 3) brussel sprouts 4) something like stuffing 5) croissant rolls, 6) cranberry sauce 7) chicken 8) turkey 9) potatoes 10) something that was like a more solid form of corn chowder and 11) mac & cheese. It was intense. I’m sick so I’d been filling my stomach with tea all day. I got fairly small amounts of everything, but still felt super full after only one round.

Then Tiffany told us what she had been keeping from us for months – she is moving to Hong Kong for work! *CRIES* HOW WILL WE CELEBRATE CHINESE NEW YEARS?! Who will cook delicious food for us? Who will be our source of knowledge for all of life’s mysteries?

🙂 Tiffany is much more than that of course. I have not even spent many hours of my life with her, but I heart Tiffany so much. You only need about an hour with her to realize that she is freaking amazing at everything. Whenever I see her I just ask her the most random questions because I want to see how someone like her thinks. It was funny because before she broke the news, I had been asking her what she wanted to accomplish by the time she is 30. Working abroad is one of them, and she is going to do just that in a little over a month!

She is my first friend to really actually move away. As in indefinitely (even though she says she will return in two years BUT WHO KNOWS!!! She may love Hong Kong and her 450 sq. ft apt). I don’t count people who moved away from Berkeley after college, because most of them are still just beginning their career paths or extra education paths. But Tiffany’s departure is real!

I wish I had a group pic of us all together, but most of my pictures are pretty bad and Tiffany’s camera has the group one. So I’ll just continue with the day…

After dinner we went to the Korean Market to do some grocery shopping. Quite fun. Then back to the apartment for dessert. Tiffany bought five new ice cream cartons and even though I knew it was a bad idea, I tried three of them. Apple pie by Dreyers was surprisingly good, but I expected it to be the worst thing ever so not a high bar to surpass. We also ate, what else, of course FRUIT TART. Li-Ting reminded us that Tiffany bought our first ever fruit tart for Laura’s cheese and grease birthday fest last March. I have eaten countless fruit tarts since, including the one Li-Ting and I bought for dinner just because we were hungry. Goodness, just another one of the great things Tiffany has brought into my life.

Then we watched tv. First An Affair to Remember. The thing about old movies – I think I am much more interested in them when people explain the synopsis to me. But actually watching old movies seems to put me to sleep. Then we watched something on Food Network that showed how our favorite Thanksgiving foods are processed. It was pretty disgusting to me. That episode solidified my desire to never buy premade food again. Then we watched Project Runway and finally a little of The Breakup before we called it a night (it was like 12:30am).

It was a good day! Makes me happy with life.

Also, I ended up striking up a conversation with a girl while we were waiting for the 51 to come. Darn game day traffic. But when we were buying Bart tickets, I didn’t know if I should wait for her or not. I awkwardly stood behind her for a few seconds before deciding to walk away. I probably should have been smoother and been like “hey it was nice talking to you have fun in SF! What was your name again?” But she will just be a mysterious blonde girl to me. Her face is already disappearing from my memory.

I really wanted to watch Precious or New York I Love You but surprisingly, the only theaters showing them were super far away! 😦 Another time…

So tired. I was supposed to run a 10k tomorrow but 1) I’m sick and 2) I really don’t want to miss a single minute of THE LAST HOME VOLLEYBALL GAME OF THE SEASON. Oh well. Tomorrow … maybe I should go to Walgreen’s and buy some medicine and watch Gilmore Girls under my covers all day.

Dude, I only have one more week of school left. I don’t count days after Thanksgiving as school days, and even if I did, there’s only one week of school after Thanksgiving and it’s not even a full week because of student strikes. My seniorness snuck up on me so fast … insane. Next weekend, Soo Jin’s bday. Next next weekend, Thanksgiving. Then … finals studying, although I wish I had gone home because that’s like 9 days of nothing due to dead week. Finals which I plan to perform moderately in. Then … life after college begins.

AGAIN, THANKS TIFFANY FOR COOKING! So amazing. No seriously – WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO FOR CHINESE NEW YEAR’S NOW?!?!?!?!?!?!

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Back in the beginning of 2008 when she was just starting her job at Yahoo and living with Li-Ting, Soo Jin and Andria (are these facts correct? Fact check!)

Lust for life

Listening to: Girls – Lust for Life

Click it. No really! You don’t even have to watch it.  I’ve been playing this song all day, it makes me smile. I just wish it were longer.

Also, a cute/creepy song: Ben Taylor – Wicked Way

Happy Birthday Frances! Last TMVer to be 21 – it feels like the first birthday was forever and a day ago. I bought you cakes to celebrate

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Then I ate them.

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The left is Caramelia (it sounds like I named my cake) – dark chocolate cake filled with vanilla Bavarian, poached pears, and caramel mousse.

The right is Passion Fruit Torte – light golden sponge cake filled with passion fruit curd and white chocolate mousse, white chocolate band. The white chocolate band was as soft as cheese and very rich.

I’m happy I decided to stop at Masse’s before buying a fruit tart from Andronico’s. Half the price, half the guilt! Twice the variety.

I first tasted Masse’s at Andria’s 22nd birthday when we surprised her at midnight. (Yes, my biggest regret in all my college years is failing to attend her legendary 21st birthday, THUGS FOR LIFE. Like, seriously, biggest regret, even after all this recruitment stress nonsense.) I forgot what cakes we sampled that day … BUT I found a picture of them on facebook! From what I can tell, we had the caramelia, tiramisu, mango mirror cake and a lemon meringue fruit tart. Five down, eight more to try!

I started writing this post, then stopped, then realized if I didn’t write this, I’d have nothing to do but my accounting project. So I decided to continue writing this.

This is what I wrote last Tuesday, November 3rd:

I have two hours before I have to leave for my interview. After this interview, I’m taking the caltrain down to SJ for another interview on Wednesday … and then it’s pretty much over. I’m bringing out the big guns aka my legs. I went to SF yesterday to buy dress shirts to match my favorite skirt. Can someone tell me a store that sells dress shirts to large chested but otherwise average sized women? I never realized until recently that buttons are NOT supposed to look like they’re straining to stay attached to the shirt. If I size up, there is all this extra fabric around my shoulders and back. Sizing down is not an option. So I just have a very uncomfortable looking upper middle section. As my mom would say “it feels like I’m being suffocated” (which refers to a time she told me “Mariah Carey has huge breasts. They scare me. I feel like I’m being suffocated whenever I see a picture of her.”)

Paulo helped me roll up my dress shirt sleeves in a neat fashion, so now I’m afraid to move my arms around too much. So helpful! Last time I had an interview, I was really rushed and was like “do you think I’ll have time to take a shower?! I don’t!” and they were like “you do!” and Paulo volunteered to help me blow dry my hair. HAHA It didn’t have to come to that, but it was a kind offer.

And then I left to go to my interview. Then I wrote this Friday, November 6th:

I’m graduating in December. If you know the implications of that sentence, you have probably had to suffer through my never-ending self-deprecating remarks implying that I was going to graduate unemployed and die unsuccessful. So to those of you who had to put up with Mel the Cynic for the past year I really heart you (in particular, Kristen, Li-Ting and Laura).

I just went swimmng – it’s the first time that I can ever remember where I didn’t think “ok … I’m swimming … time to think about what I would say in an interview.” Very relieving, yet my head is so empty. I need either a) drama in my life or b) a soapy show that creates drama for me to live vicariously through.

So yup! I got a job offer. Or more accurately, internship offer, meaning I work January – March, hopefully get a full-time offer (the Kristen D method), and spend the interim months following my initial plan of learning how to surf and squishing every youthful experience I ever wanted to have into five months before I begin the endless path of full-time employment (interrupted only by layoffs and death).

If you’ve ever wondered, this is what 16 years of academic work, extracurricular activities, and character building looks like:

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I painted out my addresses – my mom didn’t raise no fool.

In the meantime, my motivation to do work has dropped precipitously. I’m now feeling sad about how relatively uneventful my senior year was compared to the other three – I expected this to happen but went on focusing on interviewing anyhow. This semester was not epic at all. But I guess it somewhat balances out my awesome junior year. I was looking through my facebook pictures … I can’t believe I did so many things just half a year ago. Last time I looked through them and I was like “wow … is that me? I can’t believe I did all these things.” My favorite photo album is 12hr food marathon 🙂

Life goes on. I’m interested in seeing what happens next.

Prepare to laugh

The thing I love/hate about ONTD is that five minutes after checking the site, maybe, JUST MAYBE if you go back to it, five posts will have magically sprung up. It’s how I’m able to waste so much of my time on the site. If I just didn’t look at it for an entire day, I’d probably skip past 90% of the articles. But when I’m obsessively checking it every half hour, somehow, stupid shit like Zac Efron’s life and how fat Jonah Hill is suddenly escalates in importance (the idea that they would put Mariah Carey and Jonah Hill in the same article about being fat infuriates me to no end. Mariah Carey is not fat AT ALL. She just doesn’t have the best fashion sense. But Jonah Hill is at Kevin Federline levels of fatness).

One article caught my eye: New R-Pattz Vanity Fair outtakes. I thought, ok, I want to see these pics and maybe I can understand his appeal. Turns out, these pictures are HILARIOUS.  I burst out laughing at the fourth one. His arms say I’m so cold! but his face says I’ve got heartburn. Then I went back and looked at all the photos again and realized every single one of them is hilarious in their own way.

My personal favorite:

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Someone completely photoshopped his right hand out.

I’m so hungry. I am hankering for a giant loaf of banana bread or zucchini bread … any sort of carby baked good with surprisingly high amounts of sugar. But every time I see a premade baked good, I think “wtf I could make this for a fraction of the cost.” The problem is, I don’t have any of the ingredients to bake, AND I don’t think I will be so eager to eat something when I am aware of exactly how unhealthy it is. Perhaps that’s why I still love fruit tarts. I have no concept of what the custard in tarts are made of, so I have no idea how unhealthy they are. Don’t tell me.

Today I went swimming and for the last half hour, every time I came up for air, I would hear this guy talking to the lifeguard. As in, EVERY time my ears were in audible range, the only thing I could hear was HIS voice. He was dominating the conversation … for THIRTY minutes. Good god, how did that girl take it? It got even more ridiculous when I switched to breaststroke, meaning I take a breath with every stroke. STILL that guy was talking every time my head came out of the water! I realized after fifteen minutes that I had no idea what the girl’s voice sounded like. Later I heard it – she was saying something … while the other guy continued to talk. HAHA I wonder how that conversation ended.

Free day tomorrow! Ideally I will magically finish all my group projects. Realistically, I will accomplish little.

Egrets. With a R

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Listening to: The Lucksmiths – The Golden Age of Aviation

In my freshman year of college I would have said (and probably DID say in a blog entry somewhere) that I had absolutely no regrets. Why would I? I pretty much got whatever I wanted, sometimes more than I expected. Summer after sophomore year was when I started to think uh oh … that wasn’t the way I wanted things to go. But no real regrets until junior year maybe. I say maybe because I feel regret, but even now, I don’t know what exactly I actually regret. I think the worst part about regretting something isn’t the actual feeling of remorse. I think the worst part is the uncertainty – all the questions that float around my head. If I had done this, would things have been different? What if I had done that, but I still got the same result?

I regret how I’ve handled several things in my life. But at the same time, I’m content with the current status of the situations/relationships. So … I can regret the process but be happy with the result? It seems like that shouldn’t be possible. Maybe I’m too eager to tell myself that I’m satisfied with the present, but I enjoy dwelling on the past.

Taylor Swift on SNL is the only time I have EVER watched a complete SNL skit. Not just one, but nearly all of them! She’s too talented. Paulo says she was probably decent on SNL, but the fact that she is so likable would make people think she was fantastic. Maybe. Or maybe she’s just ridiculously awesome. I wish I could be that instantaneously likable. Is it something I can work on? Or is my bitchiness too ingrained into my personality?

I want to make this when I go home for Thanksgiving. And I want to buy chicken and make Thai curry rice (the curry comes premade from Trader Joe’s). Other food wishes: Andronico’s fruit tart, Ben and Jerry’s pint of mint chocolate cookie, La Burrita. Oh wait. I’m on a crash diet until Thanksgiving.

This clip makes me laugh every time. Connie Britton is so awesome. Just another one of about fifteen movies that I need to see. How come freshman-junior year, when I had friends, there wasn’t a single movie I wanted to watch? Now it’s senior year and I have a giant queue of movies, but no one I would ask to watch with me.

My Haas takeaways

Random. My dad called to tell me I got a letter from Haas saying I got scholarship money in the middle of my senior year. He can’t read English well, and I can’t understand what he says most of the time, but from what I could make out, apparently it was for “my accomplishments in Haas.” If by accomplishments they mean scoring the mean on everything I ever attempt to do, ok then. But FINE I will add this to the short, very short list of the benefits of Haas.

1. $2,000

Since my mom doesn’t trust the internet and refused to use EFT, the money is actually waiting for me in check form in some university office. So I just have to get it and then … SHOPPING SPREE! Oh wow, a week later, it just dawned on me how much money this is. This like like 40 pairs of jeans … or maybe more realistically, 5 pairs of jeans, 4 Cal sweatshirts, 3 pairs of shoes, 2 weeks worth of business clothes, and a shit ton of Yogurtland, Gypsys, and Cancun.

2. Priority registration

It is pretty awesome that some people have to sign up for a class in Phase 1 of telebears and still be put on the waiting list, but I can sign up for a class a few weeks before school starts, and I’m automatically in the class. I think this is my most conceited reason, but feel free to correct me.

3. Free Top Dog, free beer

They have free food from time to time, actual food, not just cookies and cups of water. The events are supposedly so we can meet the dean and offer suggestions. I have no idea who the dean is. But thanks for the chicken apple sausage, sir.

4. Cushioned seats and electrical outlets

Sometimes it’s more of a hindrance to learning than a benefit, but god damn, those upholstered, cushioned seats are great for my tush. I’m reminded of Haas money every time I have to wriggle around some tiny wooden desk/chair for non-business classes.

Other than that … nothing. I realized that I could have taken a completely different major and my group of friends would not have changed. I did not meet a single one of my better friends through Haas. If anything, I have met the majority of people I dislike in college through Haas.

Once I was waiting to talk to my audit professor during office hours. He was talking to someone else, and since the door was open, I could hear their entire conversation. She was worried about recruting, he asked “are you in Haas?” she said “no,” he responded “oh you know what that doesn’t even matter, honestly. It really doesn’t mean that much.” When it was my turn, he asked me if I was in Haas, I said yes, he said “that’s great! It helps, it definitely helps. It puts you one inch above the rest.” Um, ok. Honestly, I think that in the battle between a Haas and non-Haas applicant, given the same GPA and similar coursework, the non-Haas applicant is going to get the job. Because at least that applicant hasn’t lost all their reading, science, and mathematical knowledge, and replaced them with the ability to do 3rd grade math and copy off posted hw answers on Thursday night.

I went to the gym at night today. Whenever I used to exercise, I would always think to myself “ok … you’re alone in your thoughts. Now prepare interview responses.” Now that interviews are over, it’s a bit disconcerting how empty my thoughts are. Well today, all of my thoughts were spent fantasizing about cursing out and punching the fucking idiot girl who insisted on using an elliptical that made horrible metal screeching sounds whenever it went up and down. It is pretty clear that every single person was eyeing her and wanted to say something, but we would all just hope that she was getting ready to leave. It is a Friday night, when 70% of the ellipticals are free, but she would NOT MOVE. She was studying a textbook. Bullshit. A) I have tried studying on an elliptical, and I know that it is near impossible to actually concentrate unless you’re holding the paper in your hands and you don’t move your head at all. B) There is no way in hell she could have learned anything because of that FUCKING RACKET she was making. For 40 minutes (and however long she was there before I got there), every second you would hear an EEEEE ring across the entire gym. How are people in this world so stupid, I don’t understand.

Who decided this?!

I read this article on ontd – it’s the one from Harper’s Bazaar that supposedly confirmed that Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are going out. It shames me to know that I am even writing about this on my blog, like I’m some fanatic 16 year old girl or 40 year old woman. Anyway, my question is, who decided to run this article?! No one comes off in a good light at all. Not even the reporter. And I totally love Kristen Stewart but this article makes it so easy to hate on her. I had zero opinion on Robert Pattinson, but now it’s leaning more towards negative.

Also, I heart Yvonne Strahovski, but the trailer for The Canyon makes me cringe so much. It’s like when I watch trailers for Couples Retreat and When In Rome – I am wincing the whole time and thinking “oh god how is this going to damage Kristen Bell’s career?” These two actresses need new agents … seriously. So underutilized.

Ugh I have so many group projects. Group projects suck ass. What a waste of time. The only benefit  you get from group projects is a story that you can tell during interviews about how you dealt with conflict within a team.

I didn’t go home last night because I went to San Jose. I walked from Embarcadero to the Caltrain station. BIG MISTAKE. A mile in flats is not the same as a mile in sneakers. Caltrain is awesome though (except for the price). Runs so smoothly. Makes me feel like I’m travelling to Hogwarts instead of the south bay.

Anyway, I came home after about 24 hours of little internet access. Checked blogs (no real updates), checked ontd (as long as I could before I grew sick of reading about unimportant celebrity gossip, which is two full pages worth), checked tv news, checked real world news, checked facebook. All of that ended after an hour … and then I just felt like my life was so empty. Like, really? One day away from Berkeley … and nothing really changes at all in my life. If I were away for a week, I know it would be the same. What about a month – would anything change at all? I don’t think so – I have nothing going on in my life. My life is the same as it was two months ago, only I’m fatter now and feel sorrier about my life.

I still feel sick. Stupid donut, destroying my innards. I ate delicious food for lunch though. Asian Fusion at E&O. I came up with the brilliant idea of sharing small dishes instead of ordering individual large ones. I hope they remember that it was my idea. And realize that they need someone with more of such brilliant ideas in their company.